A world Federation

There is always a tug of war going on about the importance of self vs the importance of the many. Capitalism and Socialism are two sides of the same coin. Capitalism is focuses on the individual while socialism focuses on the many.

The flaw of individualism is that it breeds selfishness and the less fortunate in a individualistic society are crushed underfoot by the wealthy. The flaw of a socialistic society is the overwhelming focus of the many over the one. This focus stifles and stagnates creativity. There is no push to excel, just to do well enough

The perfect society in my eyes is one that can focus on the self and the many. Where there is benefit to help the many and the one. 

This is the reason for a world federation. A world federation could address the needs of the many and the one. A united federation of world states could address their own internal issues while coming together to work on global problems. 

Global issues which fester like a infection now would be stamped out by cooperation. Pandemics, fugitives, kidnappings, world hunger, the ecosystem and other pains could be addressed by the entire world instead of years of bickering from sovereign states that result in nothing being done.

And the human atrocities would become a thing of the past. No more genocide, no more wars, no more oppression. Because every state would answer to every state.

But every state could have it's own say in it's territory as long as it doesn't harm one's human rights 

We need to become one people and still be one. This is not a contradiction. It's what will save us from ourselves. 

The Advent of Excellence: The Solution to All The World's Problems Is Love a...

The Advent of Excellence: The Solution to All The World's Problems Is Love a...: "Is love and compassion. It sounds corny, but it's true. There is a critical lack of compassion in this world. The reason millions suffer and..."

The Solution to All The World's Problems Is Love and Compassion

Is love and compassion. It sounds corny, but it's true. There is a critical lack of compassion in this world. The reason millions suffer and starve is because no one cares enough to help them. 

If more people were loving and kind, they would assist their fellow human and everyone would be happier. If the richest and wealthiest helped others, then the kindness and love would radiate throughout humanity.

The problem with humanitarian crisis isn't a lack of funds. It's a hoarding of funds. If people shared what they didn't need, then less people would starve and die from preventable illness.

The cause of humanity's plights are humans being selfish assholes. The cure is Love and Compassion.

The Ghost and The Darkness: The Shadow Falls

My teen years were the most troubled times of my life. I started going through puberty, my voice deepened and I started getting moody. My shrink prescribed me Depakote and that caused me to gain a massive amount of weight. The meds caused me to have such a massive appetite that I would eat until I threw up and I would still be hungry.

Another side effect of the meds I took was breast growth. I was ridiculed and teased my whole youth because of it. I was called names like "Mr Breastman" all the time and made a song about it. I was so bothered by it as a pre-teen and teenager that I began to wear a heavy winter vest to school and never went swimming. The cruel kids and adults started calling me "Vestman" afterwards.

By this time I am very confused sexually and am torn up about it. I never heard of bisexuality at this time so I started fearing that I am gay. I started asking myself  "How can I be gay if I am sexually attracted to women?" My pain and suffering grew worse as the family started to abuse me physically, mentally and emotionally.

I then attempted suicide by taking pain pills. A family member stopped me only to beat me afterwards.

During this time I went in and out of psych wards. The people in the psych wards tried to drill in my head that my family's problems were my fault and mine alone. This traumatic experience added to the shame of my sexuality caused me to feel that the world and my family would be better off without me, and so I attempted suicide in a closet by hanging myself while I thought everyone was gone.

I was found in the closet and cut down and promptly beat

The Ghost and The Darkness: Start of Darkness

My early childhood was a happy one. I was praised for my intellect and my willingness to help others. I was a overachiever and a straight A student. I was intelligent enough to do my schoolwork and help everyone in my class at the same time. I was also a speed reader and could easily read and remember whole text books aloud in mere minutes.   

I wasn't arrogant or anything. I believed myself normal. As a child I saw being praised for my above average intellect as normal. I believed that my level of intelligence was normal. I was a avid church goer as well. I was happy to attend sunday mass every week. But even then I had a hard time doing as the other church goers did. 

In a black baptist church. Things are expected to get loud and exciting. People are expected to stand up and dance in great joy. I did nothing of the sort. I simply watched and listened. I begin to doubt the power of my belief, even as a young child. I didn't "feel the presence of the holy ghost" as the others did. I didn't have the urge to stand up and dance in joy, and that made me worry.

I believed in God, but as a child I didn't understand why I didn't feel what the others felt. I asked preacher after preacher the question and they were only annoyed at the small child who asked too many questions. So I read the bible instead.

Once I reached the age of around 10 I started noticing things. I realized I was different from others. They coveted expensive clothing while I shunned it. They shunned intellect while I coveted it. They had a list of behaviors that was considered undesirable that I had and I didn't see the problem.

Then the heavy duty stuff came up. I once over heard some kids talking about someone being a "punk" "funny" and "faggot". Me being the curious kid back then asked a adult what those words meant. I received the typical religious explanation and was told that those people go to hell.

This greatly troubled me. Ever since I was a small child I knew I was attracted to boys and girls and always wished I would wake up a girl. From then on till adulthood I would fear hell.

Prologue: The Ghost and The Darkness

I used to be very jealous of the people who recieved help from friends, family and other allies while I faced the darkness alone as a child. Even as a adult, I burned with jealousy and disdain of media darlings  because this victim who everyone loved and wanted to rescue, while I was a ghost to everyone.  But now I look at it in a different way.

I am not and will never be lovable. I will not ever have a legion of friends or people fighting each other to rescue me. I can only depend on myself in the end. The simple fact that I am still alive is testament to my ability to fight for myself. I need to fight alone because that is how it's meant to be. The darlings who won people over to help them need that help. They are not powerful enough to stand against the storm alone and they are no lesser because of that

People are different. I'm writing about my experiences in life and how I got to this in life to serve as a warning and a lesson of what happens if parents and teachers ignore the cries of their children for help. I will also write about the gradual damage to my life and mind caused by the abuses I experienced and how that damage affects my life to this day.

I sincerely hope that my writings help someone. The Ghost and The Darkness will truly be a Advent of Excellence.

The Sage's Inscriptions

Thinking of trying to write again. The thing is that the smallest bit of stress leaves me a incompetent mess of nerves. I need to find a way to relieve stress before writing. 

I know I'm good enough to hang in there with the best. I know I'm skilled enough to write things people will want to read. I also know some writers spend years trying to defeat a block, like I've been doing. 

I know that some of the reasons I try to do what I can is wrong. I want fame, I want people to respect me for my skill. I want to stand in the halls of the greatest of all time and be lionized for my skill in my craft.

I want to be a household name that's used in everyday speech. I want to be revered for my abilities much in the same way that Muhammad Ali was for boxing, Bruce Lee was for martial arts or MLK was for imspiring hope.

I want glory. I want fame. I want greatness. I want to write lasting pieces that will become norm in schools to read. I want to have a legion of unwashed fans wanting to sell their soul for my next book. I want to influence the future greats with my works.

I want to bring a tear to the deity's eye from the greatness of my works and have it come down to give me five.

And I know I'm capable of greatness. I just need to conquer my inner devils and break the chains that hold me down to mediocrity.

But there are non selfish reasons for me wanting to become a writer. If I were famous, I would matter in the eyes of the populous. My words would actually carry weight. I could use my influence to push things on the right track. I could bring the light to the people fighting injustice overshadowed by the Snookies and Charlie Sheens of the world.

It is simply much easier to do things when you are rich and famous

The Poison Of Negativity

One of my most infamous personality traits is my negativity. I've been told I suck the joy out of a room when I walk. I've been learning the cost of being negative. People like being around happy people because positivity and negativity are contagious. And no one wants someone's negativity getting on them, so they avoid.

If one is negative most of the time, that affects their resolve when they try to succeed, which causes them to fail. 

I guess that should be considered my 4th goal. To not be negative. I won't be firing sunshine out of my ass anytime soon, but I can follow the old saying. "If you have nothing good to say, say nothing at all"